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Conversations With The Tuesday Night Girls: The Question Was Asked: Is There Life After Divorce?

Yes, Virginia, there is!

Tuesday Night Girls was borne to a group of women – some married, some divorced – who were looking for a bit of social company within their ranks of girlfriends over the age of 50.  What began as a love for the show American Idol, developed into a meeting on Tuesday nights on Janine’s back porch for a beer or a glass of wine.  After Janine’s separation from her husband, Tuesday nights segued into a regular gathering of friends.  What began as a social activity had become an addictive support system, and I mean that in the most positive way.

Of the five divorced members in our little klatch, one of us has opened her own hair salon, one of us is an artist and a writer, one of us is an interior designer, one of us is in Human Resources, working for a national firm which requires her to fly across the country several times a month, and one of us is working as the head of an in-house legal team for a well known company.

The topic of remarriage often brings on doubtful groans as not a one of us is now willing to engage in such a relationship again, and it might not be for the reasons you are thinking.

Simply put, we’ve become accustomed to being our own boss, to living the single life, and to enjoying our free time as our own.  Together, we’ve accumulated over 100 years of wearing the hats of mother, wife, housekeeper, cook, volunteer, laundress and road warrior, and we are, quite frankly, tired!

Having a relationship with a man is nice on so many levels, but not so important to us that we want it to be a permanent arrangement.  No, we are not “man haters;” quite the contrary, and we deplore the question when we are asked.  We quite like men, actually; we enjoy their intellect and their wit, we just don’t want to be married again.  It’s a bit like loving chocolate, but you know when you’ve had enough.  I’m sure there are a lot of men out there who feel the same way.

And just to add a little caveat, none of we women actually wanted a divorce…it just rather grew out of an inability to see things in the same way as our husbands, to get along, and/or to appreciate the extracurricular activities in which they engaged…if you know what I mean.  So, you see, it really had nothing to do with picking up socks from the floor or putting down the toilet lid, despite that ongoing philosophy.

The independent life was foisted upon us, and we made the best of it.

We merely chose to pursue our dreams in consolation, and they have paid off in spades!

So, for those of you out there who might be thinking that your divorce is the end of the road for you, we’re here to tell you that it doesn’t have to be.  Turn what you like to do into a career or a lucrative hobby.  But the first step, in our view, is to find a really good group of girlfriends who will support your dreams.  And, of course, if you decide to remarry – they will help you plan your wedding!

Blessings from The Tuesday Night Girls!

See you next Tuesday!

Read more posts by Claire Butler, blogger for JenningsWire.