Do you want the “secret” to knowing how to read someone’s true personality?
The method I’m about to share with you is 100% accurate in every way, shape and form! Save yourself hundreds of dollars in books, seminars and time trying to really know what people are “like!” My method is FREE although you may have to spend a few dollars on gasoline. If you’re bold enough, with the opportunity….you may be able to “hitch a ride,” but if you do that, do so at your own risk! Your “classroom” is the open road and twists and turns through thousands of miles of “purple mountain majesty… across the fruited plains!”
A person’s character can’t be fully measured by their shoes, clothes, face (as Psychology Today recently reported), choice of music, food or books! Don’t even consider “living together” to “really get to know anyone!” You can find all you need to know about anyone by watching how they drive their car!
After 30 years of experience, observation, and over 1,000,000 miles of travel, I can tell you this is true! People drive the way they live their lives!
For example, take the “Fast and Furious” driver that just has to be ahead of everyone else… They weave, and speed and show little, if any, regard to fellow-motorists. All that matters to these drivers is “getting ahead” of everyone else. They take unnecessary risks that put others in danger to get what they want and need. They anger others, show no compassion and do what they do for no real good reason! (Usually, after all their aggressiveness, they are the first to wind-up at the red light anyway! With you just behind them!). So… they risk lives and property to “be number one” only to be exactly where everyone else is anyway!
Outside of their vehicle, the “Fast and Furious” are normally arrogant, angry, always “right,” obnoxious and verbose to the point of a headache the size of Mount Vesuvius! These are the people in the world who care only for themselves and lack compassion, patience, understanding and empathy. They don’t care much for helping others, they have no empathy or means of compassion, and will stomp on anyone to “make their point” in life. Poor choice for friend or love-interest, unless you enjoy loving someone who can only love themselves. With these people you never know where you will wind up, or how you got there! “Let them pass.”
Then we have the “Nervous Nellie” drivers.
These timid, skittish, overly-cautious drivers not only move like a herd of turtles, but can be equally as dangerous as the “Fast and Furious” drivers. In their travels, they seem like they are driving as if it’s their first day behind the wheel… every day! They frequently “slow the flow” of the world around them, and everyone wishes they would speed-up a bit or get off the road! The “Nervous Nellie’s” are huge inconveniences on-the-road, and like the “Fast and Furious,” can put others and themselves in danger, but for different reasons.
These folks are too careful and refuse to take any risks! They are unsure of themselves, ultra-conventional, inside the “box,” and deathly afraid to not be. In life and at work, they certainly do NOT “set the world on fire,” and won’t ever be spontaneous, daring, inquisitive, or show much emotion. I’d like to be “nice” here, but can’t….they are BORING!
If you’re seeking adventure, spontanuity and surprises, you won’t find them here!
Outside of their vehicles, they will be difficult to engage in meaningful conversation, creatures of habit, show fear in the face of ANY “change” and be “cheap” with their money. The “Nervous Nellie’s remain behind-the-times, and thrive on strict structure and repetitive routine. They won’t like to “try” different restaurants, vacations, clothes or methods of “growing.”
While they may show compassion and care, they simply won’t be much FUN!
Do your best to “pass” them, and move on.
Another “Driver” to consider is the “Multi-Tasking Motorist.” These drivers are fun to watch, as long as you keep your distance! They try so hard to text, talk on their cell phone, eat, drink, put on make-up, read and drive! These are the people who just can’t stop DOING! The task of driving simply becomes another thing to do in their busy lives! They may mean-well, but their priorities are “all over the place!”
Certainly not uncaring people, their caring may actually cause another’s problem. While “on-the-phone,” or “texting” a friend or loved one in need, they may not be paying attention to the slowing motorist in front of them, and SMASH! “I’m so sorry!!! My friend needed to talk to me and I wasn’t paying attention!” This is the main issue of concern with the Multi-Tasker! They are far too scattered to pay attention to the matter-at-hand!
They will expect you and those “around them” to watch out for them, and you MUST or you may get “side-swiped!” They are high maintenance.
When they step out of their car, they have very little concept of time, especially others’ time! They think nothing of being late, not “listening” in conversations, “texting” while at dinner, asking others to rearrange their schedules to accommodate their needs, or cancelling commitments at the last minute because something else “came up.” At work or in relationships, these “Multi-Taskers” can be quite frustrating and unpredictable. They tend to make one feel “less important” or disregarded when it comes to intimacy or friendship.
These folks are unorganized, flighty, and full of energy! They can be a lot of fun, as long as you are “in the picture,” but those times may be few and far between as their “social calendar” changes hourly. Too much going on! Drive next to them if you like to be daring, but keep your eye on them always!
Finally, there’s the “Considerate Driver.”
These drivers are the “cream of the crop!”
They don’t drive too fast, nor too slow. They “take risks” when they have to, and try hard to not inconvenience others. They drive when they are supposed to be driving, and tolerate all of the nuances of the others. They just want to get where they are going, cause no one any problems, and steer clear of nonsense “on the road.”
The “Considerate Driver” watches everything around him/her, predicts dangers ahead, and does what needs to be done to protect themselves and others. Not perfect always, but aware! No unnecessary risks, no rudeness, aggressiveness, aloofness or inconveniences! This is the stable one! Find this driver, and your chances of a great mate, co-worker, employee or friend are highly favorable!
These are the people who “go with the flow,” aren’t too afraid of change or risks (when they are necessary for survival), and have a clear understanding of those around them, friend or stranger! They feel, think, negotiate, plan, are patient and know when to act and can also “bend the rules” when needed. They will be fun, unpredictable (in a good way!), compassionate, steady, safe, persistent, tolerant, caring, considerate and reliable. (Get in their car!).
“The Road” we are told through music and folklore tells us much about much! I am adding my “contribution” to the Traveler’s Guide to Life. There is truth to character through how we drive! Good, bad, careless, considerate, rude, etc. Use it if it helps! It can be a very useful tool for anyone who is open to it! Always drive safely, and Happy Motoring!!!
Leo Battenhausen, MSW, LCADC, is a contributing blogger for JenningsWire.