You’ve met “the guy!”
He loves you! He’s “all you ever wanted!” He loves your friends! He loves your family! They all love him! You are so happy, fulfilled and finally where you always wanted to be! Suddenly, you sense something is amiss! Is it that he now wants you to dress differently? Or questions “where you are” all the time? Maybe he wants you to spend less time with your family and friends….You tell yourself…”He loves me! He must be right!”
However….it just doesn’t feel right! What do you do? Friends and family start questioning your “Mr. Wonderful!” They may say things like…..”You don’t seem like yourself!” Or…”are things okay?”
You may know they aren’t, deep down, but oh, that love! Mr. Wonderful! “I felt so fulfilled when he came into my life!” You may convince yourself that “he needs me!” Guess what!? He does! Not like you may think, though.
Narcissism
Narcissism is or was a Personality Disorder that until 2013, was in the American Psychiatric Association’s DSM IV. (What is that??) The Diagnostic Statistical Manual (DSM) is the tool used by Psychiatrists and Psychologists to assess mental health or emotional disorders. It includes criteria for Major Mental Illnesses (Schizophrenia, Bipolar Disorder, etc.) and Personality Disorders (Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, Antisocial Personality Disorder, etc.).
Well….guess what?! The American Psychiatric Association will be excluding “Narcissistic Personality Disorder” from its classifiable “Personality Disorders” effective in 2013! Why? “Narcissism” is one of the top topics “searched” on the internet as of 2012! This is due to the fact that there are more Narcissists in the U.S. today than ever before!!!! People….. (mostly women, because most Narcissists are men) fall for them!!! They are good at luring people (women) into their “trap!”
The children of today
Children today are being “coddled and made to be very inactive” by their parents that they don’t have the time to experience full emotions, including disappointment, problem-solving and empathy! Narcissists know none of these things! This is the problem! Narcissists somehow learn to be endearing, engaging, and “lovable” despite their complete lack of empathy! Their ability to “lure” is amazingly effective! But, remember! Anyone or anything that seems “too good to be true” usually is! I’ve been a Psychotherapist for about 20 years now.
I can honestly say that 95% of my clients are seeing me, not because of their craziness, but because there is someone in their lives making them feel crazy! This is treatable as long as clients that deal with these narcissists are open to accepting this as “nonsense of others” in your life! You have the power to do so! You must decide to accept it, and use it! As this epidemic of Narcissism grows, please be aware, and feel free to contact me for help!