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Looking For Mr. Or Mrs. Right!

A personal success story.

I was in my final year of veterinary school when I joined ChristianMingle and met Jacob, who at the time was 4000 miles overseas inAfghanistan serving with the US Army. Both of us had very busy and stressful schedules that made dating in a traditional sense extremely challenging, so we tried ChristianMingle.

We knew early on through our letters on ChristianMingle, the live chat, and the COMPASS test, that the Lord was using this vehicle to bring us together. We were married August 5, 2012 and could not be happier!

If you want to have a successful relationship in 2013 you better put on a happy face. A recent poll by ChristianMingle* found that the personality type the majority of singles steered clear from in 2012 was a pessimist.

Check out these poll results: Which of the below personalities was the biggest dating deal-breaker for you (or your friends) in 2012?

  • Negative Nellie, Has a constant pessimistic outlook, as if the world is ending on 12/21: 54% (Women: 57%, Men: 49%)
  • Tech Junkie, Barely stops tweeting long enough for a date and/or checks the ever-present smartphone constantly: 19% (Women: 18%, Men: 21%)
  • Couch Potato, Spends too much time watching TV and/or obsessed with favorite TV shows: 15% (Women: 17%, Men: 12%)
  • Political Enemy, Voted for a different presidential candidate and won’t cross party lines, even for love: 10% (Women: 6%, Men: 16%)
  • Olympic Wannabe, Started watching the Olympics around the clock and suddenly became obsessed with the U.S.Olympic team: 2% (Women: 1%, Men: 2%)

We all know New Year’s resolutions are easier made than kept, especially when ‘Finding Mr./Mrs. Right’ is at the top of the list. Is your current online dating profile scaring away potential admirers? It’s time to purge those overused, red-flag words that cause potential dates to look the other way. Ashley Reccord, spokesperson for leading online dating community ChristianMingle, offers her expertise on how online daters can decode and update their profiles for 2013.

AVOID these key words and phrases:

  • “Down-to-earth”: While this description is considered a positive attribute to most, using this phrase demonstrates a lack of creativity, which consequently will result in a lack of interest.
  • “I can’t believe I’m doing this”: All this communicates is insecurity. If you’re admitting to being ashamed or embarrassed of being online, how do you expect to be taken seriously or respected by your fellow online daters?
  • OMG! Ur a cutie, BTW! LOL J”: No one wants to enter into a relationship with someone who can’t take anything seriously. Also, if writing is a large part of what draws admirers to your profile, don’t be lazy. Take the time to write intellectually with no shortcuts.
  • “I’m not into games or drama”: There aren’t very many people who ARE interested in games or drama, so making it a point to mention it may raise some red flags as to how much drama and game-playing you’ve had experience with in your past relationships.
  • “Here is my life plan”: Listing a “life plan” is a serious offense, as it only communicates your unwillingness to adapt to change or be flexible in a relationship. Open-mindedness is key – isn’t that what brings most people to online dating in the first place?

INCLUDE these key words and phrases:

  • “I received my master’s degree in XYZ”: Whether it’s your master’s, bachelor’s, or another related degree or certificate, you want to be sure to include this information to communicate that you are an intelligent individual, devoted to being successful in all aspects of your life. It will also help attract like-minded individuals who share your drive to learn.
  • “Last year, I backpacked through Europe with close friends”: Whatever it may be, find a way to share a travel story or a passion. It’s great to show your adventurous side, which can convey that you are open to trying new things.
  • “I enjoy taking my dog for runs”: This statement not only communicates that you are fit, but that you love animals as well. Pets can play a huge role in your love life, and having compassion for a pet is a good sign you can have compassion for someone else.
  • “My personality is most like Mindy Kaling”: Instead of saying “I’m funny,” associating your personality or sense of humor with a lovable personality will gain more attention.
  • “I’m a volunteer”: If there are activities you do out of the goodness of your own heart, be sure to communicate that. It shows that you are dedicated to something outside of your career and you can take a genuine interest in doing good for others and the community.

In the midst of struggles there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

* Christian Mingle Survey Info

Ana Weber is a blogger for JenningsWire, a blogging community created by Annie Jennings.